3 Steps To Make Sure Your *Next* Man Isn’t The Same As The *Last* One

(Required: Several pieces of paper, A pen, And your full attention)

The feeling is probably familiar. You’re finally over your ex. You’ve taken the time to rebuild yourself, heal, and take some time alone and now you feel ready to “get out there again”.

There’s just one thing holding you back: fear you’ll attract another guy who’s just like the last one. You don’t want a repeat of the bad ending to your last relationship. Who would want to live through THAT again? But, you also are getting tired of living alone, without someone to share you little daily joys and big life successes with. So you take a deep breath and go for it. You plunge back into the dating pool.

After meeting some okay guys (and some not so okay guys) it happens. Him. That guy who grabs your attention. It’s like someone reached inside you and turned on a switch. You feel so drawn to him, and he to you…. you start dating. This is great! This is exciting! At first everything is about romance, companionship, chemistry. You can’t get enough of him. He can’t get enough of you.

So you begin to fall for him, and let yourself trust again. You open yourself and connect deeply, intimately again. It feels wonderful…

Then something happens.

Suddenly, you can feel a shift. He’s not calling as quickly, or as often. Things that didn’t used to bother him, now seem to. You go from feeling free and totally yourself around him to walking on eggshells so you can maintain a good night, or good weekend without it turning into him withdrawing. You slowly begin to worry he will abandon you, and in the process you abandon yourself. Safety, companionship, comfort, passion and chemistry all become shaky or non existent. Replaced by feeling let down, disappointed, like you went from being the center of his world to the last thing on his priority list. You try to make it work. You settle for less and tolerate this unfulfilling mess for as long as you can before it finally ends… either with a dramatic fight, or with a fading away as he becomes invisible and disappears.

Either way it’s happened *again*. And you are so hurt, and mad at yourself, and ready to never go through this again. Just like you were last time.

Does any of this sound familiar? Because if it does, and you are like the majority of the women who come to me for help, you probably would like to know how to break this cycle for good. If you’re nodding “Yes” to yourself right now then you’re in the right place. Today I’m going to share with you one piece of the formula I use with clients to help them stop dating boys, and actually find the right man to be their soulmate, lover and best friend in a lasting relationship. I’m going to teach you part of step one in my formula. This is a practical formula that really works. Are you ready? Good.

Step one in the “Date Men, Not Boys” formula is “Who”. It’s a look at who you have dated, who you have attracted, who you have been attracted to, who the right man is for you, and who you can become as a woman to attract him.

The “Who” step is the foundation of the formula. Let me give you a little piece of this step to show you how it can help break the pattern of repeating bad relationships over and over again with new guys.

Go grab yourself some blank paper and a pen. (If you already have these, congratulations! You were clearly paying full attention at the outset of this article! If not, I’d ask that you grab a paper and pen now, and return with your full attention too so we can break this man-cycle for you). Give yourself ample time (at least 7-15 minutes) to do this exercise.

Got them? Great. Now, answer the following questions on your paper:

1. List the traits (personality, habits, attitudes, beliefs, job, family, behavior, etc.) of the men in your last three major relationships? What was your dynamic with each one? Describe these at the start, middle and end of the relationship.

2. What common threads are there between these men and relationships? What is the pattern?

3. Who did you have to be for that emotional pattern to happen? What did you have to do or not do for that pattern to work?

Okay. What you have before you is the map of the journey you have taken through the past to get here today. You will see all the detours, pitfalls, and wrong turns that happened. By looking for patterns in your own emotional behavior you will see exactly what is causing these bad relationships to repeat like a CD or iPod playing on repeat loop.

Time to get unstuck!

What we do next in this step of the Date Men, Not Boys formula is to focus on breaking your part in the pattern, so you stop attracting these guys and relationships. We craft for you a clear vision of Who the RIGHT man is for you, and who you can be (the best version of yourself) to attract him for a healthy, lasting, loving relationship. What would you rather have, another guy who leaves you feeling ignored and like you aren’t enough for him, or the man who looks into your eyes and fills you with his love and desire every morning when you wake up in bed together?

It’s time to break the cycle and make a different choice than you ever have before. You don’t need to go through the disappointment and pain every again. Take this sad break-up song off repeat and decide to put something new on that makes you feel sexy, empowered, loved and let’s you *groove* to the music that’s in your heart. The song I like to call “I gotta be me!” Come and get your love!

If you found this exercise powerful and want to take things further, click the link to hear the interview I just did on Vivid Life Radio where I share how to stop dating boys and find your soulmate instead. We cover how women who are successful in every area of their lives except with men and relationships can finally find a fulfilling, lasting relationship, plus we share secrets on power dynamics and even dominance/submission “Fifty Shades of Grey” stuff comes up!

Grab a glass of your favorite beverage, click the link and hear a playful, raw, truthful interview where I share some things I have never revealed before… http://vividlife.me/ultimate/39097/barry-paul-price-discusses-how-to-stop-feeling-lonely-start-feeling-loved/

Much love,

Barry