Today I want to offer a tool to busy women, high-acheivers, Moms and others who don’t have time to waste on dating that doesn’t produce results. It’s a 3-Step tool that I describe below, or you can listen to the audio version of this by clicking here:
[audio:https://barrypaulprice.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/3-Step-Dating-Tool-For-Busy-Women.mp3]
Or Right-Click Here To Download File
Don’t use the excuse, “I’m too busy to meet people,, so I have to use online dating.” You’ll never grow that way. You’ll never achieve success in this area with that approach — and you’re smart enough to know that.
Dating, love and romance is the one area where we have to be less linear and result oriented.
Instead, start by asking yourself:
“Why have I set myself up to be so busy?”
“Do I feel comfortable being less busy, honestly?”
“What emotional need am I meeting?”
Often, we are doing it to feel valuable and good enough… if I do less I feel like I’m not performing well enough at work, or I’m being a bad Mom. We’ve tied being good enough to being over-worked and over-loaded. We try to demonstrate self-worth to ourself by strivin harder, longer, and rarely taking time to nurture our OWN needs.
So.. STEP ONE is giving yourself permission to meet your other needs…
STEP TWO, and this is counter-intutive to strong-achievers, is to ask for help – but you won’t do this so long as you still tie your self-worth to you having to do it all. Until you feel a deep self-love and value just for being you, regardless of how well you do at tasks, until we move past that perfectionism playing roles for other people or in your business, you have more incentive to do it all yourself than to allow yourself any breathing space.
So, notice if this step is hard for you to do.
Once you’re ready to take step two, choose ONE thing you can ask for help with. Something you logically know would be wise to take off your plate professionally or personally. Give the kids a task, or delegate at work.
It will feel like less will get done, but really that’s just the control freak in you hanging on because you fear loss of your own value if you don’t do it all… Remind yourself it’s okay… give it away to get better.
This is where I see clients personal lives and professional lives improve the MOST.
Now, STEP THREE, with that little bit of breathing room you’ve created fill it with a NON-TASK oriented activity out around other people that nurtures you, brings you JOY (if it’s been so long since you’ve done this that you don’t know what activities those are, first of all notice that that’s NOT a great sign, then think back and remember things you used to do that brought you joy long ago).
Write at a cafe, go to a wine tasting, I had one client go roller-skating.
This brings JOY and FUN and silliness and variety back into your life. It creates the possibility of intersecting with new people, which is a must for dating. And do NOT go with ANY goal other than enjoying yourself. Otherwise, this will not work!
You will not immediately meet the right man, and that is FINE. The return on your investment here is a happier, more relaxed YOU who is appealing for people to meet and connect with! The return is that we are creating breahting room in your life so there are actual opportunities for people to meet you.
This is a process of becoming the best you possible, so you can attract the best partner. Don’t rush the process with impatience. Shortcuts are the fastest way to the back of the line.
So be time-efficient this week. Give yourself permission to put your non-goal oriented needs first. Ask for help. Then do an activity around others that brings you joy.
If you run into some inner blocks or resistance using this 3-Step Tool, check out my additional resources at http://www.barrypaulprice.com/articles or begin removing the blocks through my free 21-Day Meditation series at http://www.datemennotboys.com/love2
Much Love,
Barry
Tags: audio, barry paul price, barry price, boys, business, busy, career, dating, dating coach, dating mentor, fear, good enough, happy, how to meet, job, life coach, love, meet the right man, men, mentor, Mom, needs, no time, personal needs, relationships., right man, self-acceptance, self-esteem, self-love, soulmate, the right man, time, time-efficient, waste, work, work on myself
Leave A Reply (No comments So Far)
No comments yet